Sometimes it's the things we say that have the power to hurt or heal the people that we love and care for and sometimes it's the things we forget to say!  Words left unspoken, chances which we let pass. Isn't it amazing how words can wound our souls so much? 

I've just spent time with a beautiful friend who always takes the time to verbalise her feelings and gives my soul positive affirmations which I value so much. I'm truly blessed to have people like this in my life. 

When my children were growing up, I tried so hard to be a positive force in their lives and to give thought to the words I spoke. I remember the teachings – words hurt if you are going to make a critical comment, make sure it is about behaviour, not the person. You are not bad, stupid or lazy. This type of behaviour is acceptable, its the behaviour, not the person that is at fault. 

I tried, but of course, I often got it wrong, I just hope that I succeeded enough of the time to give them strong powerful and confident souls strong enough to cope with the world today.  I try to forgive myself for the times I failed, and I promise to work harder in the future to be like my dear friend.

I remember hearing a song a while ago that used the parallel of the footprints we leave in the sand to the impact we have on the Earth and in the lives of people after we pass.  There are lots of songs, but the one that I really found moving was the version by Beyonce. 

My actions or inactions do have consequences, in big and little ways we all affect the people around us, our communities, our friends and families and our partners. I hope that when my life is finished, the people who celebrate it at my funeral will agree. 

 That I gave my all, did my best, brought someone some happiness and that I left this world a little better just because I was here.

Caught up in the latest Fad!

Have you ever found a new interest and thought it was just you? Then you find that without realising it you had stumbled onto the latest fad. For me, the most recent example was triggered by the approach of a birthday. While 60 may be the new 50, it still comes as a shock to me that I've arrived at this part of my life. Sometimes the aches and pains are reminders enough, but then I catch a glimpse of my reflection in a mirror or in an adjacent window, and I'm shocked! That's not the way I feel inside.  This body and face I show to the world are alien to me.

Recently I decided to take a hard look at my face and skin and decided that it was definitely letting the side down. Years of living in the tropics had taken the toll on the condition and texture of my skin. Anxious to make changes and in an attempt to turn back time, I turned to Google – as you do! So I googled – 'skincare for mature skin' of course YouTube was full of videos on the subject. After lots of time spent watching bad videos, I finally found several excellent vloggers and started binging on their channels. Sali Hughes was one of the first I found that made sense to me, and she seemed knowledgeable and qualified to give advice. In one of Sali's videos, she mentioned a Skin Analysis website maintained by Olay – so of course, you know I checked it out. With fingers crossed, I put my details in, took the selfie and waited for the analysis to return a skin age. The results were awful; my skin was judged 12 years older than my chronological age! So back I went to YouTube in search of answers and a possible solution. I binged on videos late into the night; not knowing then that the blue light from my iPad was doing further damage to my skin. I bought lotions and serums, increased my knowledge about active ingredients and all of the necessary chemicals and ingredients in good skincare products. Well, it took some time, four months actually, but I can now log into the Olay website, and my skin is judged to be 10 years younger than my real age – yay success. I thought this success was just my journey and then I started talking to some friends, some my age and some younger and I realised that what I thought was my personal journey was just a case of me being caught up in the latest fad. I thought I had spontaneously found something new and then I realised that I had been sucked in. I'm not sure how or when or by whom but I had been drawn in by whoever or whatever creates the latest fads. 

Was I responding to marketing that I was sublimely seeing or is it some group consciousness? I will probably never know, but my skin looks great, and I have so many new jars and bottles of 'stuff' to try it will keep me amused for a while.

Here are my picks of YouTube channels for women over 35 years. I have spent many hours searching for exciting and relevant advice for mature skin. Lots of channels show very, very young attractive, women advising about minimising wrinkles and how to treat under-eye bags! 

If you are interested here are my recommendations, all of these channels offer quality advice and are YouTubers with relevant information about mature skincare.

Nadine Baggott - great skincare and makeup advice.

Lisa Eldridge - fabulous makeup advice some skincare.

Pampered Wolf - good skincare and makeup advice - she sometimes includes her Mum in her VIdeos - Mum is 60+

Caroline Hirons - no-nonsense skincare and makeup advice.

Gothamista - very knowledgeable skin-care advice.